Wednesday, December 23, 2009

HORRIBLE Christmas Stories

These are two original horrible and funny Christmas Stories, which I would like to share with you. I leave it to you to decide whether these are true stories or just pure fiction!

Horror Story 1:

Jim, a teenager was walking in the void deck after a Christmas Party. He hadloads of fun with his friends just an hour earlier and was walking home, beaming with joy with the presents he had received from them. He loved Christmas and he valued the message of Christmas, which is the spirit of giving and sharing.

Halfway through his walk, he was disturbed by a cat which was wailing loudly. “Poor Cat, it must be lonely”, Jim thought to himself, “How I wish the cat could have someone to accompany and share the festive moods of Christmas!”

As he walked further, he came to the sight of an old middle-aged homless man, sleeping soundly on a chair in the void deck. Jim thought to himself yet again, “Poor man, time is probably lost on him. It does not matter to him, whether it is Christmas or not, as he does not even have a home”. But still, Jim wished the old man has somebody to share the Christmas with.

To help to do his part to bring the sharing and giving spirit of the festive season to others, Jim suddenly thought of an idea. He ran to the cat a hundred metres away, carried it in his arms and hurled it at the sleeping old man and exclaimed: “Merry Christmas, now both of you will not be lonely for Christmas!”

Horror Story 2:

If you have watched “Twilight Sage: New Moon”, you would have caught the scene where the female lead actress faced the situation of the half-naked hunky werewolf man being surrounded by few other half-naked hunks who sprang from nowhere at night, soon the hunky werewolf man, were off to somewhere the lady did not know with those hunks after he has given her some lame excuses to leave.

Mary, a housewife found herself right in the plot of this blockbuster movie, when about three men, who were his husband’s friends came to the door of her home one early night. Similar to the movie plot, they were asking for her husband to leave with them. However, sad to say, these 3 men were either fat or skinny. Mary’s husband, gave her a similar lame excuse and left with these men. It turned out that her husband has gone for training sessions to prepare for their coming reservist Remedial Trainings!

Yup, as you have guessed correctly, these were pure fiction originated from my mind. I might have a modicum of ill humor… I seek your pardon and hope you would not be hurling a cat at the homeless folks sleeping in your void deck, come Christmas eve, which is just hours away. Let the poor homeless folks have a blessed silent night. Merry Christmas!

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